Why Do I Exercise?

Summer is back, which means that I make an effort to rise from my bed, lace up my shoes and go running.

And by running I mean jogging and walking.

So why?

We all have our many and varied reasons.

I can tell you right now it is not to "feel the burn" or experience "weakness leaving my body" in the form of pain.

It is not because it "feels so good" or I "just couldn't live without it."

I can totally live without kicking myself down the sidewalk.

I do it for two reasons really.

1. I get to run away from home. Literally.

When the girls are screaming (when are they not?) and fighting (ditto) and I feel like my head is going to swell and pop like a balloon on a hot day, I lace up my shoes, say I feel really out of shape, and run away.

Jog away. Walk. Whatever.

You know what I mean.

And I can keep running until I can't hear the screams or the fights and my head slowly starts deflating until I feel like I will survive to see the next day.

And instead of getting upset at me for abandoning him in the middle of a toddler wrestling smack down, the Artist cheers me on.

Sucker.

Which brings me to my second reason.

2. I am trying to look good for my handsome husband.

This is purely psychological because no matter how long I exercise I never look any different. I don't lose weight. I don't gain it. I have come to terms with this.

But he disagrees. He thinks I look better when I am out there killing myself.

People believe what they want to believe.

But I am going to run with it and let him think that every time I come home sweaty and de-stressed that I am lookin' like some hot stuff.

If you squint.

Hard.

Yesterday I left the house in the middle of one of the Dancer's tirades. The Cowgirl wanted to come with me so we took a leisurely walk instead of a jog. When I came home I was greeted a few blocks from my home by this: A girl who knows that flowers and chocolates really do fix most female problems.

We all have our coping mechanisms, right?